The realization

What can I say? I lack discipline, focus, drive, motivation.  Raise your hand if you feel the same way (I see you with your mental hand up).  I spend so many hours on Pinterest and Instagram "looking for motivation." At some point, you'll find the one photo or article that actually gets you to say yes, this is what's going to motivate me to get back in shape, right? Wrong.  The only thing that worked for me was to step onto the scale.  I'm tired of people writing "What the scale says doesn't matter" because they're wrong. It does.

While I've been accepting of how my body has looked for the past few years, I've often said to myself that the scale isn't taking into account how much muscle I have.  And while, yes that's true, the scale is telling me that I weigh too much for my frame and height.  I've spent more time trying to tell myself that the weight on the scale doesn't matter, but it does; it's telling me that I'm overweight and carrying around 19 pounds that my bones don't want to carry.  It doesn't matter if the weight is from fat, muscle, or water; it's more than what I should carry. I'm a strong believer that once you're in "good shape" is when the scale doesn't matter.  Because you probably are gaining more muscle at that point.

So, what's the plan this time, since it hasn't worked for me in the past? Determination--yeah, it sounds cheesy to me, too.  I think that you're mind will give you the discipline, focus, drive, and motivation when you're ready.  I wish that my "ready" had come before my wedding, or honeymoon, or summertime, but it didn't.  It came on November 26th when I stepped on the scale a few days after Thanksgiving when the extra pounds from the holiday should have melted off by now. And they haven't. Because I'm already carrying more weight than I should.  And it needs to change.

Past Excuses and the Realizations:

• I'm too tired (No crap you're tired; you're lugging a 20 pound backpack all over your body)

Details, Details

What a day! It's hard to go back and explain your own wedding.  It goes by in such a blur, and really, we all just want to see photos, am I right? We used shutterfly to make coffee table books of our favorite photos, but here are some highlights:

Apple Christmas Ad

I tear up every time I see this advertisement. I originally saw it three years ago when I opened an internet browser at school and it loaded the Apple website and started playing the commercial. I love it every time. It makes me think of my students who often seem glued to their phones, but I know that they could do this sort of thing with the technology that they have, and some of them do create videos like this.

Apple Holiday Advertisement

Summer Exploration: Kayaks

This summer just flew by! It is the first time in my life that I haven't worked some sort of job during the summer months.  I found it very relaxing and it gave me a large amount of time to move into a new classroom--with windows!!  But for the rest of the time, it was simply nice to spend time outside with some of my favorite people.

My mom and I made plans to eat at Another Broken Egg Cafe on the Northside of Indy.  I had the skinny omelet, but traded the goat cheese for American.

I also had two opportunities to go kayaking! Our friend, Carol, has kayaks in southern Indiana.  We went for a three hour tour, and spotted bald eagles!

Sesame Chicken and Broccoli

I looooooooooooooove broccoli--and pretty much every vegetable--and Cole is trying to eat it because he knows it's healthy. Side note: I offered once to melt some cheese to put on the broccoli to make it a treat, and he said that he wanted no part in it if it would no longer be healthy. Touché. 

Cole had a work dinner the other night, so I took the opportunity to make lots of broccoli--and didn't bother to put cheese on it, thank you.  The end result of my meal actually ended up fitting into the Paleo guidelines, which I checked about the sesame oil here.

It was really easy to make.  I thawed out some frozen broccoli, sautéed it in ghee butter, mixed it with minced garlic, sea salt, and pepper, and voila! broccoli is done.  Then I put the chicken breast onto the skillet and cooked it until it was done all the way through, then drizzled a little sesame oil along the top.  Note: you do not need much sesame oil at all; I probably used less than a tablespoon.  Then when I put the chicken on the plate, I zigzagged honey across the top. 

Boom. Sweet and savory goodness while being clean eating and not a pain in my butt to make!

What's in my Lunch

As a teacher with my prep period as the first period of the day, I've found it hard to eat consistently in a way that will benefit a healthy lifestyle--or weight loss if I'm being honest.  So, I'm kind of doing the 21 Day Fix by using the containers to measure out the portions for my lunches and snacks, but I don't really do that for breakfast or dinner... In order to eat a little bit every hour, I need "grab foods" that I can pop into my mouth between classes and it usually includes snack-size baggies of the following:

• strawberries

• cut mangoes

• raw sunflower seeds

• raw almonds

• walnuts with chocolate chips

• baby carrots

• turkey pickle wraps

• orange slices

• dried apples slices

• deli meat slices

• beef jerky

• grapes

Question:
What do you pack for lunch?

Summer Exploration

We aren't hitting big time parks, but I've been taking Dottie to a few parks this summer to go for walks. It seems that we will need to get out earlier with as hot as its getting. Although that has given reason to stop for ice cream afterward...

Month of May

I was able to have a whole week with my sister! I feel as if I only see her three times a year now... Anyway, while she was here, she, my mom, and I decided that we would have a day trip on the Tuesday she was in town.  We started off going to Midland Market downtown since Natalie had never been and I've picked up some cool items for the house from there, and then we grabbed a quick lunch--elevensies, if you catch the reference--at Ralph's Great Divide.  This was my first time visiting Ralph's, and I loved all of its little quirks.

"Probably Asian Chicken" and Broccoli

Tonight marks a new dinner for us. I don't think I've tried a new recipe in a loooooong time. I had decided to make Hawaiian chicken and started following this recipe, but I didn't actually have all of the ingredients for it, so I improvised my own version, which is probably just sesame garlic chicken? All I can smell is the sesame... Oh, and I didn't feel like cutting the pineapple in the end, so definitely not Hawaiian anymore.

Smiley Pup

Today Dottie came in to let me know that she loved me and that she thought we should go outside... And that she has such a cute puppy smile

Day Three of Running

So I'm feeling pretty good about this running stuff! Yesterday, I went for a run that turned into a downpour. All of my running, at least for a few weeks lasts for 30 minutes. At 8 minutes in, I was passing a lady that said she was trying to decide if she should turn around and head back before she got wet. I got to about 12 minutes before it started sprinkling, but I was determined to not let that shorten my exercise, so I continued to run and the sky opened up right at 15 minutes when I turn around. Note: I haven't made it to straight running yet; I'm running 3 minutes and walking 1-2 minutes, and now I'm getting drenched.

New Regimen

So I went ahead and started my new running schedule a day early because it was a beautiful morning and I thought it could only help get me going for the next 30 or so weeks.  Today was simply running or walking for 30 minutes.  I used the MapMyRun app and ran for two minutes and walked for one minute until I got to 30 minutes.  In 2009 when I trained to run my first mini marathon, I had a pace of 9:30 to 10 minutes per mile.  By the end of this run/walk, I averaged about 12:30 per mile and had a distance of 2.54 miles.  I feel pretty good about that.  I wish that I hadn't accidentally washed my old iPod in the laundry a long time ago... I never did recover all of the songs since my laptop stopped working. Sad face.

Lack of Motivation

I want to lose weight.... I want to look toned.... I want to look like I did 10 years ago....

These are thoughts that I constantly have, and yet, I pretty much never do anything to meet those goals. Do you ever feel like you really want something to happen, but it remains too abstract that you simply can't motivate yourself to consistently work at it? And then it just seems like being lazy?

Chicken Bone Burgler

Don't you just love Buffalo Wild Wings? I treated myself to some medium-sauced wings for dinner while Cole was in San Francisco. Since I'd be eating alone, I even ordered traditional style rather than my usual boneless wings. Unfortunately, I wasn't the only one who ended up enjoying them. I had thrown the bones and trash into the bag and left it on the table. When I came back, the bag was on the floor and all of the bones were gone. Someone is guilty, I tell you!

Wedding Progress

As of today, we have accomplished a few big things in preparation for the wedding.

• Set date
• Reserved reception venue
• Reserved the church
• Reserved the priest
• Signed up for Pre-Cana 
• Bought my dress!!!

Hey Chicago, Wha'd'ya Say?

Cubs win!!! Cole and I were able to enjoy a fun weekend in Chicago to meet up with friends and watch the Cubs game against the Rockies. We got in around 9 or 10 on Friday night to my friends' Eric and Lauren's place. We brought a cooler of beer and mimosa ingredients for the morning (gotta start the morning out right!).

First Winter

The past few weeks here in Indy have been pretty chilly and white. I enjoyed the amount of snow that we got, even if it made it a little tricky getting to work on a few mornings. It's worth it to get a view like this

Christmas At the House

This is my FAVORITE holiday.  I have been "collecting" items for Christmas all year long. Putting it all away made me feel like I didn't have too much, so that's always good.  I didn't realize until making this post that I never took a picture of our tree--sad face.

The presents are actually empty; I just liked the bags

Thanksgiving Cruise

How great is it to spend a whole week with your family? Many would say that it sounds awful, but I am lucky to be rolling with a fun crowd.  My grandmother, who passed away in the spring, wanted us all to take a trip together for the holidays.  This year for Thanksgiving, my mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, Cole, his mom, and I went on a Carnival Cruise, sponsored by my grandmother, Miss Dorothy!


If you know my dad, you know that he has a tiki obsession.  Early in their marriage, he and my mom visited family in Florida and they went to the Mai-Kai Polynesian Restaurant in Fort Lauderdale.  My whole life I have heard my dad speak of this restaurant and how cool it is and that if I ever go there, make sure to do it at night--the place looks like a carnival in the daytime.  So we all flew down a day early so we could have drinks and appetizers at the Mai Kai.

Wait, why is it a heart?

Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! I'm engaged!

On November 15th, Cole and I were meeting up with some friends in downtown Indianapolis for a birthday.  When we parked, Cole texted them to see where to meet, which was on the circle, but they were running 5 or 10 minutes late.  So, we decided to walk around the monument which was being set up for the Christmas tree lights.